It took just ONE phone call to just change my perspective of things. I might not know how it feels to be in her shoes right now, or how much pain she's going through, or how she's going to wake up the next day feeling something is missing and that something and someone can never come back to her because there's nothing she can about it. I might not be close enough to lend her a hug or to send my condolences right now but what I can do now is to just let everybody know how much they should appreciate their loved ones at this moment and not take them for granted because in a split second, everything can change.
You might just hear stories just like that all the time, or go through the lines above countless of times saying that we should appreciate people and all. You're probably going to read this post and probably think that epiphany has just struck within you and you should start going to people love and start telling them you love them. But you should realize that situation above, it has never happened to you yet. Even if you have experienced it, you've moved on and you've even probably taken someone for granted right now. It has never happened to me either, but what I'm doing here is to really do my best to turn things around and change a part of me; taking people for granted.
Your parents, your friends, your boyfriend or your girlfriend, your brother, your sister, be it whoever, you've been mad at them before, you've gotten into arguments, you've taken them for granted. Little things or major problems that made you angry or sad, you know deep down they don't really mean it. Sometimes, arguments can go on for days or weeks or sometimes even months, and sometimes, they might even just go on unresolved. Why live in anger? Why live with such torture to your heart? Imagine the other person left the world while you were still mad at him or her. Imagine that you'll be in so much pain and guilt and sorry for not just admitting you were wrong, or sorry for avoiding that person for a long time just because she wouldn't lend you her textbook, or whatever. Imagine that you wouldn't be able to forgive yourself. Imagine that you could have compromised and that person would have gone peacefully without having so much anger and sadness in them. Imagine. All that.
But I can't. You can't. No one can until they lose someone.
So what can we do? Well, it's entirely up to you how you want to show your appreciation and love to someone. Just realize how important they are to you and what they mean to you now.
About the last post? Scratch the entire thing. I don't need him to bring me to prom. I finally realize that if I'm still in a relationship with him right now, I'm contented with that. To talk to him everyday, be it just one text or a simple call, it's enough. Prom? Just see me before I leave the house and I'll call you when the slow dance comes on. =D
I won't say that everything is going to be alright because it's not. When you get through all of this, you'll be stronger. Girl, you will get through all of this with your family and friends beside you. Even though he might not be there physically anymore, know that the memories of him in your heart is what keeps him alive to you.
Rest in peace.
Toodles with love,
Alanna the Banana
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